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I have a fear of saliva. Nobody understands it. For years my family and friends had made fun of me and even went so far as to use it as "playful" weapons. If someone were afraid of the dark or claustrophobic it wouldn't be okay to lock them in a room. So why is it ok for them to spit on me or lick me. It's gross and I absolutely hate it. Today my mom made me soup which was really nice for her, but I saw her trying some off the spoon and licking it.
When I said something she and my brother started saying that it's not normal for me to be like this and get over it. I can't help it. I'm not going to just get over it. You can't just tell someone to get over an issue I've had since I was little. Today I've done some research on what kind of germaphobe I am because that's what I've always been told I was, and it turns out I'm not one I just have Queunliskanphobia.
When I told my mom she continued to tell me I'm not normal and to get over it. Why doesn't anyone understand? She's afraid of heights. My brother is afraid of the dark. Arent those irrational? Just because you don't fear someone don't make others fears lesser.
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Almost everyone has irrational fears. Some people are able to get over them, some people aren't, even if they know it's irrational. As you said, your family members have irrational fears too, so they should be understanding. I guess because your fear is a less common one, they don't see it as valid. Have you pointed out to them that they have irrational fears, too, and yours is just like that? Maybe they don't realize how similar these things are.
ReplyAlmost everyone has irrational fears. Some people are able to get over them, some people aren't, even if they know it's irrational. As you said, your family members have irrational fears too, so they should be understanding. I guess because your fear is a less common one, they don't see it as valid. Have you pointed out to them that they have irrational fears, too, and yours is just like that? Maybe they don't realize how similar these things are.
ReplyIt's easier for people to dismiss the things they don't understand rather than to try to make sense of them. I have a fear of things that should be straight and aren't (Uneven frames, uneven ground inside a mall or a house).
Try discussing it with them on a normal day and not when there's a reason to discuss it like the spoon incident and compare it to their fears. If that still doesn't work, make peace with it, people don't need to understand it for it to be justified. It's YOUR fear and only YOU will know the intensity of it and how to cope with it.
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