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If you are in crisis and need immediate help, please call 1-800-273-8255 (NSPL) or text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line). More resources.
Ok bear with me here, and PLEASE don't freak out.
I'm kunda having a rough time right now, and thinking about ending it. I know. "Oh no! Don't do it, you have so much to live for! Try these resources!!"
I've tried them, and they all say the same thing. I need something different, which is why I come to this.
Is it weird that the only thing I think is keeping me alive right now is "what will my coworkers think?" I've sorted myself out with my family and friends, that doesn't bother me anymore. But for some reason the thought of my coworkers talking about me in the past tense bothers me. Maybe I'm just crazy.
Anyway, don't expect me to go very far, can't do much in a pandemic, plus I've still got that looming question haning over my head. I won't be gone yet.
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Hi. First I want to say I'm so sorry you are feeling this low and bad. I want to reassure you that you're not weird, even I've had thoughts like "what will my coworkers think?" when I've experienced suicidal ideation. I think that's normal because you see your coworkers often enough that they're kind of like your community, if that makes sense, and maybe you just don't want them speculating negatively about you after a suicide. I think maybe it can reflect concerns around what legacy or reputation you feel you're leaving behind, especially in the eyes of people that you possibly respect like your co-workers. I want to ask - do you feel alone, lonely, or alienated in your life? Like how close are your relationships with your family, friends, and coworkers? Or do you feel kind of distanced or outcasted by them in any way? Are you experiencing isolation or interpersonal problems/conflicts? Are you satisfied with your job overall? Anyways, sending a *virtual hug*, I know you'll get through this. :) I also want to tell you that /depression lies/ - There is no circumstance that is unmanageable. There is no situation that is ever hopeless. You can overcome this! :) I see you fighting and working on it, you got an online virtual pal that is rooting for you! :D Cheers!
ReplyIf you do it, you won't be able to finish writing your life story.
ReplyForrealll
Try r/S____ watch on reddit
ReplyHey you beautiful gorgeous person, most people on here are able to relate to this a lot. thats why we all come on here. we are all supportive and here to help. I hope you're day becomes as fabulous as you. You deserve life.
ReplyHey when it gets hard for me I like to think that in a very distant future I will be happy, that's what keeps me going. When things get hard and I think "Well one day you will live in a beautiful house", or anything else I desire, and I imagine very little detail of it. It usually distracts me long enough until I don't feel as bad or at least until my headache goes away. I know everything I think of will never happen.... but I have done it so long now it feels real like in a dream.
Reply