Dear S.

You randomly message me once in a whole to apologize to me, even though I've forgiven you a long time ago. Every time that I don't jump at your words, you start "dating" someone. And every time it has made me wonder about myself, because they all are oh so ugly. And I'm not one to judge a man..but jesus christ. Did your standards leave you when I left? Believe me or not, I do miss you. I loved you a lot, I meant when I said that I would give my life for yours. Everything I did was not enough and it carried with me. I have tried another crack at relationships since, and did everything right, and again, I keep choosing women who I don't know are still hung up on some ex that disintegrated their self esteem and I have to pay the price. I have to pay the price for another man's mistakes...constantly. You say you want to talk but you never get back to me. It looks like you just wanna make your presence felt and just ignore me until six months pass and you remember something about me. I would hear you put but I believe you have no intention of telling me anything. I hope you stick with it...i hope you do for your family. Make a good life for yourself, love yourself. Treat the next guy the way you should have treated me. Don't settle for any infidelity, don't say any bad happening is karma for how you did me...im good and everyone deserves good things.....we all have done people bad at some point. Good luck with everything. Every time I hear the stir of a pot of mac and cheese...you cross my mind.