What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
I have this online friend, he has made various accounts of attempting to end his life. We have been friends for over eight months now. Last night I called him and showed him my face for the first time. I was positive the whole time and he continuously told me to say a slur to him. I continued to deny him on it and he still urged me to. I ignored him while he was saying those remarks and continued being positive. He told me he was going to get a knife for protection and nothing else, but it was sarcasm. I hung up and began crying. He has guilt tripped me so many times and when I ended the call he said I wasted his time and that I hated him. None of it was true. I don't know what to do because if I leave him he might end his life. But, if I stay, he will soon influence me to feel that way too. The urge to end my life and I have numerously thought about it before but I try to be positive. I just am so lost and don't know what to do. Please help.
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
Maybe unfriend him, he is putting you down but tell him why you're doing so. If anything backfires immediately block them. You do not need to be put into that position of guilt-trip let alone manipulation.
ReplyHey, what he's doing is called emotional manipulation. It's not your fault he feels the way he does, and as a friend you probably want to do everything you can to help him, but it's really not your responsibility to fix him. You should recommend that he gets actual help, and distance yourself from him. Block him if you need to. He shouldn't be influencing you to hurt yourself, making you feel guilty, or giving you negative thoughts.
I know it can be hard to not be able to save someone that's hurting, but you have to look after yourself as well. Friendships shouldn't feel bad. If the time spent with him is more bad than good, consider letting him go. Most of the time when people make threats to hurt themselves like this, it's usually to keep someone in their life. He'll most likely be fine without you.
Hope you're okay.
-k.
ReplyIf he decides to end his life it's his decision ONLY. As long as you're not telling him to do it, then you're doing everything right. But he seems to be throwing it back in your face. In a weird way, maybe he is using you as a reason to continue his downward spiral, like out of spite. One way or the other, it's best to walk away from the situation because it's not getting any better for either of you.
ReplyThe fact that you recognize what is going on is a clear sign you need to remove yourself. If you think he is going to actually hurt himself or you are genuinely concerned, please seek the authorities.
This is not your problem. As terrible as that might be to say. You cannot take on everyone else’s problems, especially those you barely know.
You seem like a nice, good person, with a moral standard. That is why I am begging you to end the relationship with this person. Surround yourself with others who do not put you in positions like this, and rather build you up as a person.
Stay strong and keep a level head.
Reply(IK THIS IS NOT GOOD AT ALL WHAT I'M ABOUT TO SAY) Look, I hope he doesn't kill himself, but it isn't your responsibility to protect someone who manipulates you. Confront him, or at least block him. And if he dies, well, good for you and those like you! He doesn't deserve your time. I know you probably want to help him, but why should you help someone like that? It's all proof that everything happens for a reason.
Reply