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I fell in love once and im not doing it again
1 month ago · · Stress, · Explicit
let's just call her R here
you R sometime in my life I pictured us marrying and having children living happily ever after I pictured us caring about each other and that's what you said that you'd do but still you left because I guess you didn't want to risk it and yet after almost two fucking years I still think about you R I still remember the day we walked together on the beach at 11 pm and we started listening to music and laughing I still remember going to the beach with you I still remember taking dumb pictures together and I still remember the days where you felt suicidal and no one ever knew and I knew and helped you to calm down and helped you to overcome this monster in you I still remember you're face R I still remember staying up all night and talking to each other and you saying how much you'll miss me when I travel back because that's who we were until you decided to breakup with me at 3am but also I remember the nights I stayed up cring about you and missing you I remember crying when the braclet that you gave me broke I remember not eating for 2 days because I just couldnt bring myself to do it and of course I remember my attempt at ending it after my final exam and I didn't find anyone to help me through it...why did you have to leave me like that after all that effort i just cant fall in love with anyone anymore i cant bring myself to do it I cant be with anyone else except you no one feels like you no one understood me like you did and I wish someday we would meet again...how pathetic of me hanging on to somebody like this