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My teenage years have been horrible so far. There have been nights where I cry myself to sleep or even wish I never existed. Sometimes even feeling like crying for no reason but there's something in me triggering it. I'm tired. I've been clean for 1 month and 19 days but urges come and I overcome them but this time i feel like I'm gonna give in. The only reason I don't wanna give up is because my sister won't have a sister, my two brothers won't have someone to look up to, my mom who loves me unconditionally won't see me again which I know would destroy her and my friend who has always been there for me.
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You are the sweetest person ever. My teenage years have been terrible too. Well I’m in my twenties and it still is terrible. But look at you. You’re so brave and so warm. You think about your sisters, brothers and your mom. You cannot be anymore sweeter. You deserve all the love and happiness. Stay patient. Things will get better hopefully.
ReplyI don't know if you realize how amazing you are, really, thinking how everyone will be sad without you, and let me tell you that this is the first step you should take, and you've already taken it, i remember how the urge came back to me when i was two weeks clean, i gave in tho, but i really think you're amazing to fight it! Try the self-harm-alternatives, you can try journaling, and if you don't like to keep a diary you can write here on novni, i really respect you,I'm in my teenage years too, elders say we have it easy, but they know nothing trust me, I don't know the main reason behind your sadness, but I'll tell you that it'll pass, i promise...I'm now a year clean, still getting the urges, but learned how to find them apparently, I remember wishing not to exist, praying to god that he takes me back so i can disappear like i never existed, but that doesn't work...look, we can do it, ok? I was able to get out of this loop so you can do, I believe in you...i really thank god for having people like you on this earth, people who are caring and concerned towards those who loves them
ReplyThanks so much but now that I have to go to school physically I feel like my mental health is going to dramatically dropped. When it was online I was ok because I was home but when we opened things got so bad for me I'm not ready for that again. Oh and congrats on being one year clean I'm so proud of you xoxo
ReplyI felt that too actually, in my country we started school again in September 2020, i had the urges again, I sometimes pich myself or scratch my self, i remeber that i wrote in my diary that:" i just hope that I don't go in that loop again" especially that i only got better during lockdown, the first three weeks, I won't say it's easy, it's not, but I eventually learned how to deal with it and get better, it was hard, but i think that this is what life is about, things never get easier, we don't get stronger( maybe some of us do) but we eventually learn hope to deal with all those hard things without letting them interfere with our daily lives, it's hard doing that, and we need to make lots of sacrifices, but it's worth it
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