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I wish for just 10 minutes you could feel what I feel. The racing heart, heavy chest pi in my stomach. It's not who I am. I wish I could fix it. I'm sorry I can't. I don't want to be like this. I promise I've gotten better. I don't hyperventilate until I pass out anymore. I don't scratch at my skin until I bleed anymore. I just haven't figured out how to make it all stop yet. My heart still races though. I still have the feeling of impending doom. But it's not all of the time. I know it's worse when I don't eat or when I do something I've worked myself up about. I can control it most of the time, so no one even notices. No one sees how much will power it took to show up to something. How much it takes to stay. Maybe your not but I'm proud of myself for just that. I'll keep getting better. I don't think it'll ever really go away though
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Wish I could help you somehow :(
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