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okkk so I have this friend who just so happens to be a boy. we've been friends since like pre-k so I'm just as close to him as I am with my girl friends. our moms are friends too so we hang out alot. I talk to him about things I wouldn't normally talk about with boys but it's just him so it's fine.... yknow?
Anyway, that being said, yesterday we were at the park by his neighborhood (no ones ever there so it's a good hanging out spot) because we were both bored and had nothing else to do. all our other friends were busy already so it was just us. we were just sitting around talking about random things like school for a while and then we got to crushes. it started out as talking about one of our other friends and who she had a crush on and then we were talking about growing up, puberty (we're both 16) and all the weird thoughts and feelings (anxiety etc.) that come along with it. it was kinda awkward lol but only a little since I know him so well. it was quiet for a second and then he asked if he could ask me a weird question. I thought it definitely couldn't be THAT weird so I just said yes bcuz why not. then he goes, "can I touch your chest? ...I'm just curious what it feels like......"
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
my soul left my body y'all. it's gone. I'm dead.
what did he just sssaaaaayyyyy??????
akasjsakaj whaaat ππ
my face probably looked like a tomato π I kinda just sat there, jaw dropped, processing what he just said lmao and he was like "sorry was that too weird? π " I said nothing and just burst out laughing because I could not believe he actually just said that. he laughed a little too and apologized again and I said it was fine. I said he could do it and he (shyly) did and then I started laughing again because it was just too much for me and after he just put his head down on the table we were at because he was so embarrassed about it. we laughed some more and then he apologized again and quickly changed the topic.
idk how to feel about all of that (what do u think..?) because first of all, omg. secondly, I uh..... kinda didn't hate it (not going into detail...). not that I'm gonna be going around letting him feel me up or anything but... idk puberty is weird. He even texted me today saying sorry again and I said it was okay since we're like best friends so whatever π π
I'm just going to um... forget about that and pretend nothing happened.. so my mind doesn't wander... I did like talking to him about the other puberty stuff tho even though he's a boy so he can't rlly relate to me that much but still. we can relate on some things like emotions. I don't really have anyone else to talk to about that stuff so it was fun. I like talking to him, it's easy. I can say anything
(P.S. what even are sexual desires??? Like wtf is happening to me?? I've been thinking about weird things all the time recently (before this incident) and I feel... horny.. I can't do anything about it tho so I'm just suffering but whatever... ugh. I have no one to explain things to me or to talk about it with and I am NOT talking about it to him π ya we're close but no, I'd die)
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I get this, because I have a guy friend too, and let's just say he's like every other boy. When ever we talk, the weirdest topics come up like, "If a girl is wearing a hoodie with writing on the front of it, I can't look because it makes me feel awkward looking at boobs..." Don't worry hon, coz that is just normal teenage boy behaviour!
ReplyI guess boys are just.... different π I relate to the topic thing so much lol
Replyhey girl. oh my soul, i have been exactly where you are.
first of all, calm your friend down and tell him that he does not have to keep on apologizing, explain to him that your friendship is valuable and that you can be his safe space. this would comfort him and he can know that you are the friend he can come to talk to about anything. if you liked having a deeper conversation with him about things like puberty, than try and talk to him about it again next time you are hanging out alone. chances are that he will avoid the topic seeing as he feels he over stepped a boundary with you, so you will definitely have to be the one to start the conversation again.
uggh girl. sexual desires. basically your hormones in your body is more mature. being horny is part of being a teen. your body goes through phases where you feel the need to be pleasured. you will desire some attention and most girls play scenarios over and over in their heads. your body becomes curious to certain aspects of sexuality, like your friend touching your breast and you saying you did not hate it. your body is going to crave more of that type of affection. do not be ashamed of feeling this way. i am curious as to why you say you can not do anything about it? if you have any questions about sex feel free to ask me over here. i will check for a response in a few hours or days, depends when you reply. i will mark my responses with an ;) to let you know that it is me. <3 all my love
;)
ReplyHiiii π©
Thanks for the advice on how to make him feel better. I couldn't find the right words to reassure/comfort him. Also the reason I said I can't do anything about my ... β¨feelingsβ¨ is because I don't really know what to do. I just want to ignore it but I can't and it's so annoying. I also don't want to have sex yet plus idk who I'd even do it with if I did want to. Uugghh everything is confusing and the boob touching thing with him makes everything more confusing. Also when we were at the park he started to say something about him having weird thoughts and then he was like "no, nvm I shouldn't tell you" and then started talking about something else..
Btw this comment was so nice to read tyyy~ <33
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