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I am really confused because if I'll be honest, not even once have I felt like I had a true calling. But I joined in architecture. When I was a kid, I wanted to be part of fashion industry, wanted to somehow bring my ideas to surface of reality. I thought I can do the same thing but in a different method and i.e, through architecture. I also wanted to pursue music because I know I can sing well with good vocal training and music theory knowledge. But things never worked to pave way for singing or fashion. Architecture was honestly unexpected. But I decided to pursue it. Now, with great effort, I completed my first year. But the last few days were absolutely strenuous. I piled up and procrastinated all my work up to the last minute. I believe I have a potential in creations, and coming up with ideas and every thing I do, I try to fetch meaning in it. That's why I was able to survive. But these days, I keep doubting myself a lot. Is architecture worth it? Is it my true calling? Do I really like what I do? Or am I just following the herd? Where does my true passion lie? What am I doing all of this for? I keep doubting my purpose and potential. So many other things like past crushes, past stuff keep coming into my mind and they bother me. I honestly didn't know if it's my true calling, and I still don't. But I can't back out. I have to continue and finish what I started. I have to take responsibility and the effort for the choices I made. I have to move forward with this career and work hard and better than my past self. I have to beat my past irresponsible self. I don't know my true purpose but some path has already been set. So I have to pick up whatever strengths I find in this path and find my purpose. That's the point. Waking up early? Giving up on junk food to be healthy? Proper sleep? Punctuality in work? Have to socialize with people and learn and gain tools? I'll do whatever my body needs and in return, I will use this body to find my purpose. I have to. I have to. I should do this right?
P.s. thanks for taking the time to read this whole crap about me hehe. Do drop some quick tips or life advices. I'll be more than happy haha
Also,
I want you to know that your existence is a BLESSING. Maybe not for everyone, but definitely to me. Enough of positivity. I hope you have the strength to deal with your issues. I know it's not all cupcakes and butterflies. Fighting!!!!
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hi, I have a bachelor degree in biology and a master degree in neuroscience, I studied for 5 years straight in the university, knowing for sure that THAT shit is not for me! 5 years! and now after 2 years of graduation, I find my self jobless! ... don't do what I did! finish your studies but do something on the side. you like fashion, take a fashion/stylish course, you have some free time, learn some skills.
when I was at the university, my friend were doing that, they would look for part-time jobs, join associations, learn some skills, where in the other hand I did nothing, why? because whenever I finish my last exam, all i want to do is to relax, Netflix, and waste my time, thinking when I'll graduate ill do this and that, guess what, when i graduated, companies were hiring those with some extra skills and more internship experiences.
Never studies something you hate, and never do something you absolutely know that it will never be included in your future.
ReplyThanks a lot! I really woke up today absolutely confused and where and what to start, your advice is really helpful. yupp i think side hustles are a good thing to start. thank youuu
Replyomg u r really a person who i met just in my situation look i wanna tell u something u have already entered into ur course and i understood u often think about ur past right?even i do but what i understood is u just need to leave it and u can do desinging after the this too good luck
Replythank you so much for your advice <3
ReplyI always had that mentality,but now I often wonder what experiences have affected me most and how they may be a part of my psychological blocks or reactions to certain things... it's so easy to put walls up, yet so hard to get over them or break them down....
ReplyI have the same feelings. I'd never been able to follow my dreams, they weren't supported or encouraged unless it was an interest to my parents. My self-esteem intertwined with my life experiences has crushed my ability to get past it and go forward to fulfill them. I'm now 50 & am lost as ever. I keep hoping there is a magic age that One day I'll wake up and feel confident again. keep plugging away though. I guess everything happens in due time...
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