My Unsent Letter

Dear That guy,

You what's amazing ? It's how magical day it stopped hurting. it did not really care about you anymore. It felt good. i could have moved on way more earlier but i was too afraid to lose my friend, to afraid to lose that one person who i thought called me beautifull and meant it. but then i realised you were just lying uk "flirting" omg you were so good that i actually belived you. that day i also realised that you were never my friend. i never really mattered to you. those i love yous were plain lies. it hurt so much that my beautiful fair tale became a trauma. i regret it. give my feelings, my body. obviously it was not your fault. it was mine. so i fixed it. i torned every connection i had with you. now even if you die in front of me i won't budge. I keep myself strong. cause it's so silly to cry over a play boy. But on dark nights like this, i tear up. thinking about all this. it feels so bad that i could not even become your friend to whom you might share things, from whom you would care. that was all that i ever wanted. i never thought fixing you or becoming you gf because i knew you i just wanted you to care about me. nevermind. life must go on. I will erase you completely one day.