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So, there is this guy at work that has been giving me more and more red flags. I was sort of friends with him, but now I need to tell him we can't hang out anymore because of his past actions. He's been stalking/harassing a 15 yr. old at work (he and I are 19) and it is truly a horrible thing. We're trying to get the police involved and stuff, but there's a lot of complicated matters. For one, the girl being harassed is afraid for management to call the police, and management can't tell her family about the situation because her family is terrible and will blame her. He also threatens to kill himself, and his mental health is a mess, and he has autism, but this should be no excuse for harassing someone. So, that's the story.
I guess my problem is, I need to tell this guy that I can't hang out with him anymore, but he might get explosive or threaten to kill himself, so I am really considering how I should tell him. I don't think I should tell him over text, but the only place I feel safe seeing him Rn is work, and what if he explodes at work again? Or what if he tries to hurt me? Idk, I don't think he'd hurt me, but he can get really angry and scary. The situation is stressing me out, and I've been ignoring this guy's texts. Also, he keeps texting me if I'm ok because I won't respond, and I told him I'm busy in person and still don't want to respond..... yeah. :/ I don't feel safe I guess, and I feel worried about my co-workers too.
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If u don't feel safe telling him, u don't have to. U might get his attention by doing so, and he might end up harassing u instead. I suggest that u slowly distance urself from him and distract him with something else so he won't notice what u r trying to do. Stay safe.
ReplyThanks, I might try this, but he keeps asking me to tell him when I'm free to hang out when I'm at work, so it's a little hard to avoid him at times. I don't want to keep coming up with excuses, and I kinda just want him to stop asking me to hang out with him at this point. I just don't know if it's safe to do that yet.
ReplyFind another job as soon as possible. He is harassing you as well as stalking this 15 year old. He should be locked up.
ReplyManagement might fire him, or call the police on him. If that doesn't happen, then this will probably be my next move. Thanks!
Reply“ I guess my problem is, I need to tell this guy that I can't hang out with him anymore, but he might get explosive or threaten to kill himself”- you still gotta draw a line. You gotta take care of yourself. He gets explosive or will kill himself? Thats his problem not yours. You were his co worker not his family.
ReplyI'd just keep being busy. A soft fade is less likely to cause trouble. If what you've said is true, there's something wrong with that workplace, him AND the 15 year old's parents who would blame their daughter for this? Hmmmm.
Stalker types can respond negatively to being rejected and the police/courts don't always make it better.
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