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If you are in crisis and need immediate help, please call 1-800-273-8255 (NSPL) or text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line). More resources.
I don’t know what to do. I just did the worst audition of my life and it was my last attempt to make a life for myself that I want not one I have to force myself to live. I highly doubt I’ll get it so now what do I do. How do I go on? I’ve got nothing left to give, I keep imagining all the ways I could die, but I don’t want to do that to the ones I love, that love me. I feel trapped, shackled in place, unable to escape the soul sucking world I inhabit. I just want to die, without hurting anyone else, but that’s not possible. On the one hand, I’ve had an incredibly lucky life, loving mother, loving friends, but on the other I’ve always just not had the information I needed at the right time so have always been behind, on the back foot. I’m tired of fighting, tired of going against the flow, but if I go with the flow I feel empty my dreams hollow husks. There is no good path, misery for me or others in all directions. I want to stop. Make it stop.
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you will be fine, at least you tried your best, k?
dont give up
ReplyA lot of people will tell you to get help from a therapist, and although that is a great solution for some people, it doesn't always work. If you happen to have any close friends, you should talk to them. Advice from people you trust and love can be extremely helpful. They will let you know that they care for you and that YOU ARE LOVED. If you can, talk to them in person instead of calling or texting them. That allows them to support and understand you better and also provides you with good in-person comfort. And you know what? If you can get through this, an opportunity even better may come up. One that you would've missed if you weren't so brave. Sometimes things go wrong in life, but that's a sign that you were just too good for it. You're gonna get through this. <3
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