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I’ve been with my bf for 8 years now, met in college and he’s been with me through some of the most experiences of my life. Supported me through the good and the bad. We were together for 1.5 years before he went off to med school in another country and it really challenged our relationship. I won’t lie, I would go on dating apps bc I got lonely being away from him. I knew it was wrong and I felt guilty, I stopped doing it but I never told him.
We are still doing long distance, we don’t live together and live about an hour from each other, and still manage to see each other on the weekends. Our plan was to move in together this coming year after I find a job by him…..
Two days ago, I was on his computer and something felt off, so decided to go through his computer. I ended up going through his history and saw he had been chatting to random girls online since last summer. I read through his conversations, and although they seemed casual, he had been sending pics of himself to these girls. They were not occurring every day but sporadic from what I had seen.
I was in shock. The last conversation was as recent as two weeks ago, despite the fact that I have been interviewing for jobs and contemplating giving up my place since my lease is up soon.
I couldn’t believe it. I still can’t believe it. I confronted him about it and he didn’t deny it at all, in fact, he explained to me that he has been feeling lonely since moving into his place by himself last summer and he had sought this attention because it’s “exciting and new”. He didn’t deny that what he did was wrong, and he is now suggesting that he needs to go to therapy.
I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve invested so much of my time into this relationship, and yes I know I messed up too, he knows as well. A part of me understands where he’s coming from, but I’m extremely hurt that he never told me how he felt.
I’m not sure if we should break up, but I know I can’t look at him the same way anymore.
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