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I was 10 he was 13
I was 5 he was in his 30's
but even then it all continued until I was 14 family, friends, people i trusted hurt me and broke my mind beyond repair.
I'm left fighting to pick the pieces back up and try and trust everyone again but its always in the back of my mind I want to break down and let someone in and just someone to listen, everyone, thinks I'm getting better but no one understands how badly I want to talk about this but I know I can't tell anyone because everyone freaks and tells everyone then I'm blamed for it happening and told that my parents tried to stop it
thats the thing THEY DIDNT STOP IT THEY LET IT HAPPEN!! and just keep saying they tried when no one will ever understand and no one hears me, that's why I go quiet because I have no one, i don't have family i don't have friends because they all hurt me
im always told that i wasn't left long enough for anyone to do anything and that I'm making it up but they don't see how badly I was hurt, broken left, and told to be quiet no one will ever realise how badly as a child i was hurt
i just wish i could leave, escape....but I can because I'm bound by law to stay, bouned by law to live with one of the people who were meant to protect me but instead she let it happen, she never did anything, I just don't get why she can't hear me!
why isn't she listening to her own child! why can't she hear me telling her that her father and my brother her son hurt me! because my body was automatically there's even tho it's meant to be mine.
but i guess its ok ill just stay quiet and suck it up like everything else.
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My sister experienced the same thing as yours. We were all heartbroken the moment we knew it. And I’m so sorry your family doesn’t understand nor comfort you at all. You don’t deserve their treatment, love. You deserve to be heard and be loved.
While all of these isn’t what you want to happen, you have to accept it the way it is. Really, you can never control not please what would other people, even your family, do to you. They have their own mind. The reason why we all have our own heart and mind because it’s for us to control. No one can ever control it but us alone.
So…. What i’m trying to say is, let them be! If you already did your best to tell your story to them, that’s all that matters. Girl, YOU have a life to live! Focus on yourself. Never expect anything from them again. You do what you need and want to do. When you’re financially able to do it, immediately live separately from them.
PRIORITIZE YOURSELF.
And hey, it’s not your fault. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
ReplyHey,
thankyou, I'm trying really hard to hold off for the next 2 years until I can move out because I have a place to go just no way of getting there without being in trouble.
I'm sorry your sister experienced it, it really is a life-changing thing and as for prioritizing myself, my bf is trying to get me to do it but my brain is so used to having me be last that idk how to without feeling guilty we are getting there tho and I'm so much stronger and getting stronger every day.
thankyou for your kind words :)
Reply