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Hi, so I'm a 19 year old girl. I am a very sensitive person with many feelings. So in order to release these feelings I write poetry. I anonymously post my poetry on tik tok. I've been doing this since I was 17, I don't have my name on there or anything, no one knows who I am. I've gained somewhat of a following on there (20k), but no one in my real life knows about it. I've been always been a pretty shy and invisible person to other people, so I have felt the urge to tell people. I guess to show that I am capable of doing something that's somewhat "cool" or "impressive". But I haven't done it, because I've realized that I don't need to prove them anything. I've decided not to tell anyone, because my account is my safe place, I've created a small community of really cool people on there. I kind of want to keep it separate from real life, if that makes any sense? It's not a trust issue thing, even the people I trust with all my life, don't know.
If I were to hypothetically get in to a relationship with someone, would this be something I would have to tell? I've never been in a relationship, or even close to one, so I don't know the "etiquette". It's been many times that my close friends and family have almost found out about the account (because they've been on my phone, with my permission). I have a feeling that it would be harder to hide this in an intimate relationship. So, let's say I gain more followers and I'm a few years into a relationship and the person I'm dating somehow finds the account on my phone, would this be considered some kind of betrayal? Sorry if this sounds really stupid, I'm just really clueless when it comes to relationship-stuff. What I'm asking is, how much can you keep private in a relationship? And if you were to find this about your partner, would you feel betrayed?
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hey there! i'm myself a person with trust issues but if i had to answer your question -
it depends on how you feel around each other, and if you trust the other one - and even if you trust them, to what extent do you trust them.
there will be a stage in your relationship when you'll feel it is the right time to tell them about your account.
i don't think it will be considered betrayal - it is up to you when you would like to tell them about your private stuff.
thank you
ReplyHey as a fellow poem writer here your writing is your own work! Like the other comment said, it depends on if you really trust them enough. But otherwise, your account is a safe space for people like you and others. So if you don't tell people that's understandable. Its an account that you feel safe with. It makes sense if you don't want to share it. But if you do, make sure it's someone you really trust. Hope this helps. :)
ReplyPreserve your safe space until you feel safe enough to share it.
Replyyou don't have to tell anyone. Personally I would find someone getting upset that I didn't tell them about this to be red flag, this is not information that affects them therefore they don't need to know it, if you choose to tell them they should be honoured but even with a very close relationship you have the right to privacy.
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