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I think I spiraled into it again...
I'm afraid my inconsistency is costing me too much peace. I keep telling myself that I just need time to get back up again, but all I do in the meantime is isolate myself and wait for things to get better on their own. I can't keep doing this... Not when there are people depending on me...
It may seem temporary, but it always happens periodically. Nothing is truly solved. Whenever I do think of fixing myself, I just impatiently think my efforts are just a waste of time and that no one really has the time and care to listen to me. I mean, why would they anyway? I'm sure everyone's busy with their own problems too.
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Google says I should find a support group, but I think the pandemic has already lead me to detach from my relationships. Hence why I'm writing this now. I'm not expecting anything. I just think posting something in the fabric of the internet anonymously would at least make me feel like I'm still here existing. Still, I hope I'll gain the courage to reach out someday.
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ANGRY RIGHT NOW
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'I just impatiently think my efforts are just a waste of time and that no one really has the time and care to listen to me.'--this is how Satan attacks you, waiting for the weak times when you are stretched thin and mistakenly thinking things will never change for you. You need to give yourself over to your creator who is there waiting for you to see what he's showing you and waiting on you to accept it, and therefor accept him. Everyone listens to our spoken words, our typed words, hence we're never alone, and there are forces too that can read your thoughts and imagination too, waiting to attack you because you didn't keep your feelings and thoughts private or shared them outside of where they should be kept private.
ReplyYou just put how i feel in words. But i hope your ok <3
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