life…

I’m a senior in high school. I’m 18. I’m going to college in the fall. I hate school, I always have, so I’m not thrilled about going to college for four years. What I have always wanted to do with my life is one of or all of these things: model, be a rockstar, actress, author. I want to pack up my things and drive about 12 hours away to LA and live on my car until I make something happen for myself. Now, I don’t have much money, I would get “slaughtered” by my parents if I ever did something like that and I’m definitely under qualified. I am 5’4, I have never sang in front of anyone, I don’t know any instruments other than a little bit of drums, I have no experience with anything, I have two books ready to be published but have been rejected by every literary agent I’ve sent them to so far. I am just so tired of desiring this life and making myself depressed over the fact that I am not living through it. I don’t know what I think I’m capable of but I have this burning calling inside of me. What am I supposed to do when all I want are those things and I could care less about anything else but have no support or known talent?