What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
Ok so my brother has been getting along really well with a girl he met. They’ve spent a lot of time together, but only at social events.
She’s got young kids, some mental health issues, and has a history of serious substance abuse/dependence (she’s recovered, which is an incredible achievement). My family also has a lot of mental health issues. Our parents have some big unaddressed issues, and we’ve got some patterns to break. My brother acts very differently at social events to how he is normally (like most people, really. Everyone puts on a happy face at a party). He’s not dangerous or anything, but he can just get really argumentative, mean, spiteful for no obvious reason, over seemingly tiny things. Whenever I see him it’s 50/50 whether I’m gonna get yelled at, purposely triggered, humiliated in front of whoever we’re with. He can also be so caring and lovely, like a different person. Our mum can be kinda similar, suddenly trying to put everyone in a bad/hurt mood for no clear reason.
He’s great with kids, as far as I’ve seen - super fun… but doesn’t deal with stress well. When our dog gets anxious he doesn’t know what to do and yells. I don’t think he could handle the stress of looking after several kids at once, all the time. I’m worried that, with this girls history, if they had arguments in the way he does with everyone else, she’d fall back to old coping mechanisms. I know that he doesn’t mean it, and the good outweighs the bad (I swear he’s a nice person other than that weird streak) but equally I don’t have to put up with it all the time in the way you would with a partner.
At the same time, he’s never had a long term relationship and I don’t want to scare her off and ruin his chances for no good reason. I think he’s in therapy, and generally trying to be better (although when he’s in that mean mood, there’s never a real apology. Again, like a different person). Maybe it’ll get better with time, I don’t know. They’re both just having fun and enjoying each other’s company at the moment, and they’re good together so far, when they’ve both always been in a good mood.
They’re both older than me, and maybe I should butt out because they can look after themselves? I don’t know. I’m just worried because there’s potentially kids involved, and they need stability.
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
Do I want to lose weight or is mental illness winning?
First things first, I don’t fatshame. I cringe when I see everyone congratulating those that post weight loss pics, with ‘you look so much better now!’ as...
-
older men U__U
is it ok 2 like old guys? i mean like men around like 40 to like idk 80? i dont find it strange to be attracted to older guys i mean, my friends say "i hav...