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Here we go, life is hitting me again, all those memories, and worrying about the future. I'm just a 14-year-old kid.
I just wish they would listen and they would understand me more.
Just like what they say, I'm just useless and I don't do well in school, they tell me that I'm lazy because I'm always on my phone scrolling and playing, and I barely do house chores. I just wish I could prove to them that I can do better and that I can make them proud. I just don't have any motivation to do well and to even keep myself going.
Like what's the point of school anyway, they never cared about my mental health. No one even asks me if I was alright if I was having problems why I'm being like this, and no one even tried to listen when I tell them why.
I just want to disappear and I want everyone to forget about me.
I don't know, I just get depressed over school, Lose motivation and get sad all the time but at the same time my anxiety says "What if I fail?" "What will my parents think of me?", I'm afraid I'll be a failure.
This is the only thing I can do right now, is to write down my feelings so I'll feel a little better, because no one even wants to listen, and even if they want to listen, they will never understand and say I'm the bad guy for thinking like this, or the "being dramatic", they will never know the pain that I felt and the battles that I fought alone.
Do they even know that I used to get bullied? Oh yeah, they knew because I told them about it, but they never cared. And do they even know that made me have low self-esteem, I always get insecure about myself that I chose to starve myself to have that perfect body? I always try so hard to make my face pretty to be the girl everyone wants.
Do they know that the "game" they get mad about is the only thing that is keeping me happy? I play games to avoid depression.
The hope I have is that maybe one day they will understand, but I think maybe not. Been like this since I was 6 years old, and I kept hoping and believing that they love me, but I'm already tired. I was never the "favorite". I'm jealous of my siblings for having the attention because they are better than me. I always get scolded and get compared to anyone which just made me worse. I don't feel like myself anymore. That self I knew was happy, brave, strong, funny, and talkative, but now I'm sad all the time, I cry over little things, I easily get hurt by little words, and I talk less.
Well, at least I wrote and I can share my feelings even if it's just here
-jhz
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Writing my feelings...
Here we go, life is hitting me again, all those memories, and worrying about the future. I'm just a 14-year-old kid. I just wish they would listen and they w...
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Idk
I have started kinda hating my parents for not going anywhere and staying on my head 24*7 and wishing i didn't have a brother so that I could have stayed alone...
Ignore and focus on your goal. Laugh and enjoy your life.
Depression occurs when you think too much. Stop thinking
❤ dont worry
ReplyDepression also occurs when you have a bad home life or a physical chemical imbalance in your brain. As nice as it sounds to just say “stop thinking too much”, I don’t think the poster is going to find it helpful. Instead, what I would say is to understand that this is not due to anything you’ve done wrong. And if there’s anyone in your life that you can tell about these feelings, try reaching out to them. I hope things get better.
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