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I graduated high school like a month ago. I have social anxiety so I missed out on a lot of "teenager" stuff. I feel like most people in my grade probably never realized I was there. I regret hiding myself away. I feel like I could have made so many great friends, but it's too late now. I have zero romantic experience as well.
In the last month of high school I started to get out of my comfort zone a little. I started talking to people who seemed nice. In the process of this I talked to this guy a few times and I realized that I really like him. I felt like I had a connection with him. When I talked to him, he made me feel comfortable. He's the first guy I've genuinely ever liked. I've had crushes before, but not like this. Usually I've just been a silent observer, but this time I actually got to talk to him. Granted, I only talked to him two times. Once in person and once through text. When we talked in person we talked for like an hour (but we were in a group). I'm pretty sure the feelings aren't reciprocated. I didn't get that feeling back from him. But then again I have zero experience in things like these, so what do I know. But I don't think he likes me like that.
The problem is that I can't stop thinking about him. I can't stop thinking about our conversations. He keeps appearing in my dreams too. I haven't seen him in two months. He's serving in the military right now (for like 6-12 months). We have a mutual friend, but she's moving abroad soon. So our chances of meeting again are slim. I know there are plenty of fish in the sea, but for a shy person with no experience this is a big thing for me. I feel like the next time something like this is going to happen is when I'm at university, which won't happen until next year, because I'm taking a gap year. I'm tired of being alone, I just want to experience something new and fun for once. So what do I do? I know I should just forget about him, but how do I do that?
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Reading your Text right now reminded me so much of myself. I was absolutely in the same Situation. Because of my social anxiety and overthinking, my school life was not really the best and I couldn't make experiences with boys neither because of this. Some years later now I have a job and fell in love for the first time really hard. I had a huge crush on a coworker and I talked to him whenever I could, he made me feel so comfortable, he was funny and my heart always skipped a beat when he got near me while explaining something to me..but I knew he didn't felt like I did and i asked myself the same question as you. How can I get rid of the feelings? The best advice I can give you is, distance yourself from him, Don't try to go somewhere, knowing that he'll be there. Don't stalk him on social media although you really want to, Don talk to him as much as you used to and Don't try to see the basic effort/human decency as him liking you back, this will hurt so much more.
Remember, you can also always try to tell him how you feel since that is the best way to know 100% and you may even be wrong and maybe he likes you as well...in case it doesn't go well you've got an experience and you know you don't have anything to regret because at least you tried.
I know that it is easier said than done, and being completely honest with you, I couldn't tell my coworker how I felt about him and he still doesn't know but I could get over him and since I'm working from home I don't need to see him and it is easier ^ ^
I hope you can figure it out for yourself soon and everything goes well, just keep in mind there is nothing wrong with you and there are people who can relate to your story, it felt like you absolutely wrote what I was thinking some months ago.
Good luck! ^ ^
ReplyThank you, it feels a little better knowing that someone can relate :)
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