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Dear mother,
I loved you dearly at a young age, trusted you with everything in me. That quickly changed. I came to you for protection from your husband and you told me my head was full of lies. I was only seven, the things I spoke of I couldn't even make the words for. I didn't know these things happened to people, I didn't know that these were things that people were supposed to enjoy. You had to give me proper terms just so I understood what was happening to me just to tell me it was all a fantasy. A sick dream of a child with a middle aged man. You let him beat me, you told me you didn't want to because he could hurt me worse. You let him beat my brother and threatened to send my brother to jail. You took away my father that was the only one that would have protected me from the monster that you called your partner. You lied to me. Told me that dad didn't love us anymore. You framed him, you and your husband did. I watched you, you thought I didn't understand. What you didn't know was, I knew what monsters looked like because I came from one. You showed me what monsters looked like in real life. When I was only six, you told us that we gave you no meaning in life. That if you killed yourself it was because of us. That God was mocking you and laughing at you. You hung yourself in front of us and we were too little to help you. The police came in time but I remember your eyes. I remember the life draining from your eyes. The color, the vibrancy that I share the same as you. I don't think I'll ever forgive you for what you put us through, but I will work on forgiving myself for trying to beg for your love as long as I did. You'll never love me, you'll only ever love yourself.
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