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After the depression as someone who takes great comfort in the ineventable occurance of death, the truth of which my mind will go silent and my heart will stop feeling and everything will come to a peaceful end
i hope one day i will be able to fear death so much so it will outshine my fear of living and the feeling of this life will never amount to anything valuable because i will wake to eyes that love me almost as much as i would've learned to love myself, look around and back on moments on my life and think 'if this is earth then what is heaven?' as my existence on this earth will hold so much meaning and be so worthwhile that heaven would only plague me with thoughts of disappointment as how could it ever live up to this right here right now?
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