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I don't want to think about this but I just can't help it, I try to be good everyday but I always fail, I can't be a better person at all and I'm giving up and I don't want to but I'm just useless and stupid and childish and I'm almost twenty but don't seem like I am. Maybe I should live cause I won't be good enough and I don't want to continue hurting my mom like I am. I don't want to think about suicide but here I am. I am afraid that the future is going to be even worst, I hate myself and don't want to be loved cause of how awful I am, and I'm not saying this so that you people reading feel sympathy for me it is just how it is I'm sorry
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