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I don't feel like talking to anyone but I enjoy spending time with my siblings but it makes me guilty because I am expected to be spending that time doing studies instead... I feel irritated for some reason when I talk to my boyfriend partly because now we have almost nothing to talk about and other than that I have this feeling that to him I am not a priority, he calls me his family but I don't feel like I am anywhere near to that... so now I have this dumb thoughts of ghosting him as if it will make things better but I can never do it , because I am attached to him ... in the back of my head and Even he is clear that there will be no us in future but I don't know why is it so hard to break up , it's almost like I am waiting for him to break my heart, rather than me doing it to him ....
I chose my career path myself but now I am regretting it on the top of that the bad habbit of comparing myself to others ...
I have this one maybe I can call him a friend we have never actually met but all we have in common is our study related struggles but whenever I talk to him I end up feeling even more down , because I feel like he is doing things more and better than I am ... so probably I will completely block him from my life... but he has talked to me before about his struggles and depression, so I don't know if that will make things worse for him .. we don't really talk that much but I hope he has friends who will help him ...
There are times when I cry just looking at my current situation, struggling from all the highly expectations, thinking only if I could turn things back ... but I don't know if I will really make different choices.....
Gud night
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You are perfect you should be no one’s 2nd honestly I’ve had a similar situation you still love the ones who are hurting you or you know they will in the end and you don’t need to compare yourself to anyone they’re not you and you are enough as you are I wish you lots of love and happiness
ReplyDon't block people out of your life unless they are truly making you miserable. If they're just innocent people who are trying to help, don't let them go. Things are gonna work out for you, it may not seem like it but you are so special, you don't need to compare yourself to others because you should already know that you are nothing like them, because you are the only you there is. No one can compare to that! Stay strong friend!
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