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Today was the day that you finally admitted to me that you took out Ashley and had sex with her.
I knew within my gut that you did, but the both of you kept lying to me.
Lena hinted to me 10 years ago that you two went out behind my back (I guess her guilty conscious made her speak and or she was just being messy as she always is).
When I confronted Ashley she lied and said that she never went out with you and hadn’t seen you in years. Yet, that very same day I asked if I could make a call using her phone and while she was distracted - I went through her contacts and saw your name and number.
Which means that she got your number from the very first time I called you from there (I never thought that she would’ve went behind my back and started talking to you - in fact the both of you were doing it)
The second time I asked her (was 4 years after she told me that you guys went to the movies and that was it). But she was fidgeting, avoiding eye contact and didn’t go into anymore detail (couldn’t even tell me the name of the movie)
I don’t know what got into you today Sir, but you decided to confess that after 10 years. You did in fact have sex with each other.
The first thing I said was: “That’s disappointing because she didn’t teach you anything”
But I just can’t describe how much I don’t understand why this was a lie in the first place.
I never threatened you guys with harm of any kind. I even gave the space for the two of you to be honest with me and you both lied.
You tried to make it seem like I was the issue, when you were lying from the very beginning about every fucking thing.
When you give people the space to be honest they still lie as a result of their low self esteem and in the hopes that the other party won’t leave
Then people get upset when I say things like I enjoy being by myself. I’m over humans now and would just like to live my life alone and with animals…
This is just the icing on the cake. I told him that I’d need some time alone to process all of this. I don’t care about the act of sex (anyone can do that) but it’s the deceit, the FULL 10 YEARS, the finger blaming that I was just making stuff up…
I’m really starting to hate humans
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ReplyGirl, you clapped back good with, "That's disappointing because she didn't teach you anything." 👑
On a serious note, I'm sorry that you went through this and for so long. That feeling never really goes away and it's always correct even when you don't want it to be. I learned a similar lesson 13 years ago.
I developed an ache in my stomach out of nowhere. I started feeling weird. I couldn't shake it. I stopped eating. I couldn't sleep. That rotten feeling kept churning in my stomach and I didn't understand where it came from. After a few months of dealing with it on my own, I finally told my husband that I wasn't feeling good and that I needed to talk to somebody. I had spent so much time picking my [very good] life apart to try to find where the feeling was coming from. Bills were paid, children were fed, the house was in order. I just couldn't shake it and I started hating waking up.
I finally reached the point where I asked my husband if there was anybody else. Was he happy? Was e fulfilled? "Of course not," he said. He reassured me over and over that I was the light of his life and that he loved me.
One day, I couldn't take it anymore and was reaching my breaking point. My hair started to fall out. As a last ditch effort to rule absolutely everything out before contacting a therapist, I went through my husband's phone for the first time in 10 years. Never once had I ever thought about invading his privacy. He had never given me a reason to. However, I needed to in order to be transparent with my future therapist.
And wouldn't you know it. There, all the way down at the bottom of his messages was a number without a name. The messages were exciting, flirty, and reminiscent of their nights in bed together. A lady he met at a bar while he was traveling for work 4 months earlier. Those texts unearthed emails, Craigslist ads, Backpage contacts (iykyk), and questionable massage parlor receipts.
Nothing had tipped me off. I had nothing happen prior that would have caused this feeling. It was pure womanly instinct and those feelings are never wrong. Listen to them.
ReplyThank you so much for sharing. Lol, I’m sharing it all now. Ashley is a very well known girl who likes to get around so I was actually surprised when he told me that the relationship meant nothing. I realized that Ashley mustn’t be a good lay either because she’s done this before with other guys (guys that we were mutual friends with) and it was the same thing. They’d sleep with her once and then it’d be over and done with.
So yes lol they must both be terrible in bed.
How are things now with you and your husband? Im so sorry that you had to experience a situation like this as well.
It’s funny how society and religion essentially normalize cheating when it comes to men, but when a woman wants to ensure that she’s financially taken care of (all of a sudden - it’s not a womanly thing to do).
Whether men get sex or not, they’ll always find some way to cheat. Ahhh, I’ve told him to leave me alone and give me some time to process all of this.
One things for sure; I’m taking a business approach to this relationship going forward now.
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