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My friends have so many other friends than me. They're the only people I talk to while they have many others they could talk to at any time. I'd like to think they're my #1's but I know it's prob one sided considering they're so much more popular then me. Sometimes I think i'm invisible to everyone else because i'm always getting pushed around, cut, and forgotten as if I don't even exist. I couldn't speak up about it if I tried because my voice is so babyish and it's honestly hard to make sound come out when I open my mouth.
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Hey, friend! Yes FRIEND! This stranger on the internet wants to be your friend because she knows what it’s like to be at the back of the room, ignored, seeing everyone else have such a good time while acting like you don’t even exist. And it IRKS you doesn’t it? After weeks at a new school, months in a new neighborhood, years at the workplace you see you never find that group that you just “click” with. You’ve never been someone’s first choice, every time you try to go out and socialize it blows up in your face, everyone seems to have their attention set on someone else at every given moment and you feel like you belong in a totally different world. Let me tell you a truth; you will be just fine. It’s not going to be fun, not fitting in and being pushed to the side. No not at all. But this will lead to you being different. You’ve tried fitting in and it doesn’t work. Being your own person will allow you to see the world and achieve things in a way none of those social butterflies can. People who spend all their time with these superficial people end up losing that special touch that makes them unique. Learning to accept yourself and support yourself is a big help down the road. You CAN be happy in your own company. You CAN find a hobby that requires solo time that you can invest a lot into. You CAN write your own story out for the world to read and realize you are something special. Loud and obnoxious people are never really heard. At that moment they may be the center of attention but it’s all blabber. The quiet people, sitting in the background and listening and thinking write the books and tell the quotes and sing the songs that stick around for ages because they are the only ones who have seen things in this perspective. I was never lucky with friendships or relationships as a child or teen. Nearing 20, I’ve learned that family time is extremely important and value each family member you have. I’ve had a rocky history with some of mine but we still love each other and value our company. Hope this helps you learn to let your real personality come out and never go back into hiding. Might I also suggest a few songs; Second Wind-Billy Joel, High Hopes-Panic at the disco, Something Wild-Lindsey Sirling/Andrew McMahon, Chosen Last- Sara Kays. Maybe the last one will help you to know you’re not alone :) best wishes
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