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I have this really strange feeling of wanting to do something but not actually doing it. I feel so pressurized and end up doing nothing at all. I am a musician, but I don't feel like singing anymore. I told my boyfriend about this. He told me that it's just you being lazy. I have these big aspirations of becoming financially independent.but It is so hard to even get up from the bed lately. I am from a really small family. We have a really small house, like really small. I want to change that for my parents as my parents are not really comfortable with the living conditions.I am so stressed out that nothing comes into my mind. Even if I am trying to do something my mind just goes blank and instead I just sit around doing nothing. This sucks. I feel like I am slowly giving up on my goals which I don't wanna do. I wanna work but I don't know how to fight this urge to not do anything at all.
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You could be burnt out, have chronic fatigue, or be depressed. Please see a doctor to find out.
ReplyAs someone else said, it's possible you've become burnt out. This doesn't mean you can't fight the urge to not do anything at all, but it might take more to get some traction.
If a fire were burned out of a fireplace, what would you do to stoke life back into that fire? You might blow on the lone embers and see if they can contagiously overtake the wood. Adding an easily flammable substance like paper could give the embers some energy. If ashes are all there's left, you will likely have to reconstruct the foundations — adding new wood to burn for instance — and then applying friction to start a new fire. If you're feeling lazy with your time, you can grab a lighter and apply the fire that way. In the end, you end up watching the fire come to life on its own and give you the warmth and light you were waiting — preparing — for.
"What are you going on about?" you might ask. Well, it sounds like to me you have goals, some embers, but are having problems letting them igniting motivation in you. You want to become independent; you want to have a new house for you and your parents; you want your mind to go in the direction towards your goals. But, what I'll tell you is that all of this needs to come from you if you want to see and feel the results of your efforts. It's possible you are inclined towards the desire of effortlessness, which could give you some feedback on how to approach your goals. You said you sing, right? Think about how you got started singing for instance. Get really detailed, specific, down to the feelings you (and others) get from singing. Hopefully they are positive motivations that give you reasons to continue. If they are negative feelings, it's likely they will be like water on your fire, putting the fire out immediately upon contact. If it is a result of your approach to practice, it's likely it is a slow burn death of your passion, meaning you'll need to add more wood.
I feel you on wanting to give up on your goals. I practiced music myself and haven't gotten back to it in a few years. It isn't easy to constantly put in effort to produce something you enjoy. But if you want independence and stability, you have to build on the fundamentals of consistency. When you do, just like the fire, you will look back and think not only about how hard it was, but how worth it it was as well.
Keep on trying to show up in little and big ways. I'm rooting for you! ♪
ReplyI am really really thankful. You don't know how much positivity your reply has ignited in me. It is hard for me but I'll fight it and I'll win for sure.🌻 It's night at the moment, I'll be reading this in my tough times. Thanks a lot. May there be light in your darkest hours as well.💕
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