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My long-term boyfriend of many years broke up with me about a week ago. I am currently in Nairobi, Kenya for three weeks for a professional event. He called me, from the States, and broke up with me the first day I was here.
The breakup was unexpected. I was blindsided. I am trying to grieve but it's really hard. I'm halfway across the world, alone, with no support system.
I really want to fly home and stay with my parents while I recover emotionally, but I have to tough it out for 2 more weeks.
I have no options to express grief. I cannot go running or hiking or do crafts or hang out with friends. It is unsafe for a white woman to do things alone in the city.
I am struggling. I thought I was going to marry him. When I get back, I am going to ask for another chance - one where we can work on things together and try our best. If it fails after that, then I know it is not the time.
Just needing some words of encouragement. Please be kind. I am struggling badly and am unsure of how I am going to survive this pain.
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I am so sorry you are going through this. I know I don't know either of you personally, but he sounds like a coward to me... breaking up over the phone when you leave the country? A respectable long term boyfriend would have enough decency to talk this over with you IN PERSON.
I personally wouldn't give him another chance... how DARE he abandon you like this in freakin Kenya?! If this is how he handles issues, how is he going to handle even bigger ones if you do end up getting married? You may be dodging a bullet here, honestly.
2 weeks... do you pray? If you do, ask for miracles in healing your heart and mind. Ask for strength to see what you have been turning a blind eye to. If not, try meditation... breathing and focusing on your breath helps get your mind out of your head. Look through IG or yourtube and try fun and easy recipes... turn to youtube to watch videos of others coping with breakups.
I think it's a good idea to stay with your parents for a while... if you have a good relationship with them, they can be your point of reference to what love and security is supposed to look like.
And wow, you're in Nairobi for a professional event! You're a loving person doing something wonderful with your life... you will be OK... just please take out the trash and keep him out.
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