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I was kicked out of general education 4 years ago. I’ve been stuck in a special school because of my bad behavior during 8th grade, and I hate it. The reason I haven’t been able to get out is because I’ve become so depressed and hopeless, I can’t stay awake during class, I hate everyone there, and I honestly want to die every time I go there, I’m terrified to return after summer.
I wasted so much of my teenage life, I wish I could’ve had a fun school life at a normal school, sitting at lunch with my friends. We have to line up everywhere we go and eat our lunches in the tiny classrooms. There are fights constantly and kids screaming, I share a school with kindergarteners all the way to 12th graders, and I hate it. Next year is my last year, I might not even return to normal school. I miss my friends, I miss being normal, I just want to be at home, at a normal school.
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That sucks. The school system definitely failed you. I've never been sent away but my best friend was, and she was never the same after that. I hope you can hang in there til next year, and please consider going back to normal school to salvage what you can of your 'fun' years. Even if it's just going to a homecoming game, prom, etc. Maybe you can replace the bad memories with a few good ones.
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