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is it wrong that i dont want a relationship, i only want physical touch from a guy? i dont want full on s3x but making out? hell yeah. cuddling? mhm.
but dates? no. labels? nope.
i just want hookups. i feel like an asshole for being so shallow and surface. i feel like some kind of slut.
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Hi, older girl here. No, it's not bad that you don't want a relationship..and no, it's not bad that you like physical touch. We, as a human species, have an innate longing for connection. It's proven that a hug can reduce your stress level, so why would you feel like a slut for wanting connection? People like to make women believe it is dirty, but what do we call guys that also long for connection? Oh right, nothing. They get a free pass in that department. Now, if you're doing it to feel fulfilled or because you think that will make boys like you, or get a thrill from getting them to fall for you, that's when it's time to talk to someone to figure out the "why." Otherwise, fall in love with yourself and your independence first. Don't let anyone dictate when the right time for you is. Vulnerability can be a very scary thing.
ReplyIf thatβs what you want, just donβt do that in your town. Because then you will get a label. Keep your activities private and be safe about whatever you do until you want something more serious.
Replyall females like cuddling. Probably because you don't get enough love and attention from your parents and other older relatives of the opposite sex, you need a real man in your life. I must, however, warn you that guys will use your emotional needs. Therefore, people wouldn't treat you well or realize that you were just an emotional person. I can assure you that they would view you as a bad lady who deserved to be treated badly since she desired it. And you shouldn't be an easy lady if you want to have a family and become a mother in the future. A lollipop can attract a large number of flies if it is unwrapped. Would anyone like to eat it, or are you going to? No, but if this lollipop was wrapped and not touched, you'd want it. Don't be a dirty lollipop with so many flies around her. Be the clean one who deserves a lovely future.Having feelings for the opposite gender is normal , as are emotional thoughts, but it is not normal to use those feelings to justify bad behavior or change who you are. Once again, the problem is not with you; it is with others around you. Stay safe, beautiful young lady.wait for the bright future you deserve a good life.If wanted a hug your mother, your dad, and your grandfather.
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ReplyYoung adult woman here. In my opinion, there's nothing wrong with that at all. I personally would not listen to the comment comparing you to a lollipop. As long as you know what you want and are doing it for the right reasons (like for your own wants, and not out of escapism for example) then I don't see the issue. But it's a great idea to wait until your older to get more involved with that side of things. That's what I did and I'm grateful because you never realize how dumb you are in your teens until you grow out of them lol. Another important note is to make boundaries clear. Let any partners know that you are not looking for dating or labels or full commitment. Don't lead people on, always be up front, and you'll find people who are compatible with you. And be safe! Being safe includes being able to recognize coercion or manipulation/abuse, practicing consent, and using protection. Be careful with who you kiss! And you are not a slut or shallow. I've never really understood why people see having safe fun as something to be looked down upon? And if you're worried about your experiences messing with future relationships, just remember that the right partner is not going to give a shit. A woman is so much more than the "purity" bullshit. What I think is truly shallow is believing a woman's value is diminished just because she has sex or kisses people.
ReplyThere is nothing wrong with wanting this!! My advice though would just be to be very careful. Id say hu with guys you go to school with isn't the best option, because teenage boys have no filter and they will talk and spread rumors like it's nothing. Coming from an older girl with that experience, one hookup with one guy you go to school with can lead to so many rumors and questions. If you don't want that, i suggest talking to guys who go to different schools/live in a different town. Keeping your life private is the best option because people are nosy as hell.
ReplyI hate to say it, but it's not just teenage boys that do this. It's full grown adults too. The second I hear locker room talk about myself, I'm out. I refuse to date a child who has no respect for me and would rather look cool in front of his buddies. A real man protects. Js
ReplyFor a laugh with a guy - try the Complements game - search "girly games" and play with nieces and young girls but then try with a boy - maybe with an apron to make you giggle
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