What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
I don’t know why I am annoyed. I actually I do. I know my grandma has Alzihemers and honestly I don’t feel anything. I mean it’s a part of life. Nothing I can do about it. I love her don’t get me wrong but why am I the only grandchild being given the responsibility of calling her every week. And talking to her every week, so she doesn’t forget me. I mean it’s impossible for her to remember me completely and it’s not like it’s a bother but the fact that it became a responsibility now I see it as a chore. Let me be. Let me find my own way of connecting with her. I already took care of her for an entire month, leaving work and not working for a a few days or even weeks, leaving everything and catering to her and am not complaining but why am I the only one being tasked with this responsibility. Am only 21, I dont need this big of a responsibility. She has her own kids and they don’t even take care of her and they leave my GMA all to me. It pisses me off so bad that am taking care of a woman who didn’t birth me when her children are here and they are continuing with their lives I have to stop mine. It’s the unfairness that pisses me off. She has all these grandchildren but am the only one who gets yelled at for not calling her or for not talking to her or sumn. Saying I’ll regret it. Tbh because of all this responsibilities am starting to hate taking care of my grandma. I really do. I hate it so much now. Now that it’s expected of me as a chore. I hate my mother and all her siblings for this. I don’t hate my grandma she’s innocent in all this but she bore children who are selfish. Making it hard for me to love taking care of my grandma. I have to halt my school life my work life and my social life. I barely had a summer and am starting the most excruciating major and I haven’t even mentally prepared for it. I’ve been on autopilot and I hate it. Am loosing weight drastically and I barely have any weight left. Am getting weaker as days go by mentally crumbling and no one sees that. They only expect me to take care of my gma and that’s taking a toll on me. I’ve never hated summer in my entire life the way I hate this one. And my gma leaves 2 days before school start making it hard to even rest before I jump into school. Even those two days I won’t be able to even rest because I have to study and prep for an entrance exam for a major am already in. Like am so mad. I barely even rested sleeping on air mattress and it hurts since am literally bags of bones and my bones are permitting through the mattress or even sleeping on the couch but that’s even worse. And it’s not like am not grateful I have a place to sleep and all but the fact that all this is happening and I have not once complained or said anything but they always find a way to make it seem like am not doing anything. Saying am on my phone and don’t take care of her. But I spend my entire day taking care of her. Feeding her entertaining going on for walks and shopping areas buying her foods and stuff with the little money in my bank account. But the moment I relax and just scroll tiktok am not being responsible. Or am not making memories with her. Tf does that mean? Honestly, I can’t be talking the entire day. I mean I love my grandma but the language is also a problem. I can’t speak my native language properly so it’s hard to actually communicate well. So the fact that am trying my best but honestly it’s not appreciated. And my mother has the audacity to say I don’t talk to her. When all she does is yell at my grandma and scroll through Facebook and talk for a couple of minutes and then run to work or talk to her friends or close herself in her room when I sit in the sitting room from 8am to 1 am at night with my grandma. The most ungrateful human being. And she says she regrets the time she has not spent with her. Like it’s not my problem. Don’t come to me saying that nonsense. It’s not my responsibility to feel anything for her it’s not at all. She chose that path now she needs to walk on it. Don’t force your guilt on me. Am perfectly fine if my grandma forgets me. It’s life it natural. What do you want me to do about it. She’s getting old and she’s stubborn to medicine. It’s her choices and life and am not going to feel guilty about anything. She says she’ll die. Yeah no shit Sherlock. She will but am not going to regret anything. Everyone does. I could die before my grandma she could die after me. We still die. So don’t project your insecurities on me if you can’t even handle the consequences you did. Like honestly I shouldn’t be her therapist. Go pay someone to talk to if you want to talk to someone about your life. I could care less. It’s not my burnden to carry. I already have my own burden. So let her deal with her shit. I hate listening to people blabber about their life and how horrible it is. Did you stop to think that my life is also falling about. Talking about how she’s overwhelmed. That’s none of my business. If you don’t k ow how to control your life and organize it, then that’s not my problem. Number one you chose to bring gma here. I didn’t want her to come now that she’s here you can’t even take care of her. Nonsense. This woman annoys me soooo much. She makes bad decisions and expect the people around her to pick up the pieces. Selfish witch. I honestly hate everyone in my life. Every single one of them. None of them are considerate no one is. And it’s annoying me. I HATE EVERYONE AND WISHED THEYD LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE.
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
Why
Why am I still alive? I know I should be saying this but, sometimes I get really jealous at orphans because from the beginning they were abandoned and disappoi...
-
One day
One day I'm going to dissapear, and you'll never heard from me again. One day I'm going to dissapear, and you'll see me on tv. One day I'm going to be successfu...
Try at a chemist to get something for your appetite so that you will eat more and put on weight. Talk to your family members about someone else looking after your gma for a while to give you a rest from it. Try hard to not hate anyone because the feeling of hatred will stay with you while everyone else is alright. I wish you the best.
Reply