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When you are dealing with a trauma, you always have a nagging feeling in your heart. On outside, you spent your day normally, as if everything is alright. But deep inside you know that it is not. When you are alone during night and finally, there is nothing more to pretend, you let that feeling overpower everything.
Why isn't I loved the way I want to? Is wanting an emotionally available person too big of a demand? What is it! Am I at fault? And, several other questions come to your mind and you keep thinking, waiting if the feeling subside on its own, but, it doesn't. What am I afraid of! Am I afraid of the uncertain future! Obviously. Am I afraid of going out all alone? Yes, I am. Even though, I know I have to. How much I wish that this would not have happened and I didn't have to break the shackles of what I thought was a normal life! I wish healing was possible in a Jiff just like that. In between of all this, there is just one good thing, that I am there. I am there facing everything, I am standing strong against the tides with hope as my armour. I wish that things are a bit better tomorrow. That tomorrow, I will find it a bit easier to breathe.
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Start shadow work, get into meditation and look at amazon on healing your trauma journals and books! I'm going to start it once my money is right everyone's gave good reviews about the books.
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