I'm so stupid.

I shouldn't have said a word to my parents, maybe it was my fault it all went downhill?

"Change yourself." Am I not good enough?

It was going SO well, I was finally becoming more religious as I started going to my religious teacher irl, rather than doing an online class. And then some girl I'm jealous of, she appears out of nowhere and honestly I feel as if I can't breath I felt like is suffocate in that very moment I couldn't concentrate on my religion properly. Why does someone who's so disgusting have to be so pretty? I bawled my eyes out after going home, why did she HAVE to go to the same religious teacher as me? Telling my parents worsened the situation. I wish I just kept to myself but I couldn't I cried a ton after that day, and fell out with my parents. Going back to that religious teacher tomorrow, what am I even supposed to tell her? After missing so many days off? And my mother asking who the girl was?