What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
So many times I stand on my bare driveway,
Thinking about you.
Gentle music inspired by the stars playing in my headphones…
The night sky above me,
crisp breaths, and a prayer softly whispered in the air.
Silence rules the black sparkles in the sky.
The month of February, 2022.
I remember when I first called out to you, on that february day.
When we first met.
My thoughts had terrorized me in a frenzy of panic and sadness.
Alone, I felt…. Alone was I…
Fighting an enemy that would scar for life, one I hid in shame.
Realizing that life was in vain because when I died, that’s it.
I’m gone.
Realizing that I really was not happy.
I was so used to lying to everyone that I even lied to myself.
I was empty like a lifeless black hole sucking in everything, not satisfied.
Realizing that I was throwing everything away by my lies, deceiving behavior, cowering and being empty…
Empty.
…
But hearing that faint call I’ve heard from you so many times,
an echo I’ve heard for years,
I finally called back. I screamed and cried for help. The enemy had overcome me.
I had fallen, hard. I was broken.…
You… YOU came running!
I watched in awe as you destroyed the enemy in front of me.
I did nothing. Nothing to deserve that,
nothing.
I can’t really remember after that, it seems that my memory of that section of my life grew faint. But I do remember that I had walked away.
Away from you. I could only imagine your face as I turned away.
I am still sorry I did.
You called again and again for months.
I came back a little but drifted away again.
Acting as if you didn’t exist…
I was sitting on a fence between the world and you.
Oh, it was a dark time. Even worse than before.
I was still blind like all the others.
Because I had never actually gotten to know you then. I didn’t see you.
One day, when finally my little brother stopped dominating the TV,
I sat down and watched one of my favorite christian youtubers.
He was talking and I can’t remember every detail…
But I heard. Something in my head. A question.
“Do you really love me?”
That moment I wanted to scream yes.
But I yelled yes.
Outloud.
No one was around anyway.
But had I really loved you then?
I turned off the TV and went to read the Bible.
It was my mission to find out.
I prayed to you every night and eventually I asked to understand you more.
To know you more.
You readily agreed and taught me through books.
Through others who have found you, and through the Bible.
The moment that I knew who you were,
the moment I understood how deep your heart really is,
that moment, I fell in love with you.
The Present.
My soul feels as if I could fly and scream of pure joy. Pure bliss.
You changed me for the better! I no longer lie. I feel no shame.
My heart has new desires, new thoughts!
I’m FREE!
I see the world differently because I see YOU.
Everywhere I see evidence of YOU.
Life is purposeless without you, but with you, life has purpose.
That purpose? Oh, to adore you, to serve you and sing a song to all nations,
telling them of the miracle you worked in me!
Although the world laughs at me for believing in you..
Although they sneer and turn away in anger…
Although I look like a fool, trying to tell them about you so they could see too…
They all seem to turn away.
You warned me that they would be this way more and more…
I know you grieve when the world steadily becomes more wicked, when they willfully ignore your call to the point they become deaf to you.
I feel your pain too.
That’s why I write this poem for you.
Every song I sing will glorify you and every word I say should glorify you…
…
Your face…
I’ve never seen it, oh, but I wish I could.
Strange… I could describe it though.
If I saw you face-to-face, I would be but ash.
For I am but a sinful and lowly human being and you?
You are so holy that the Bible describes you as a consuming fire.
Your eyes… The colors flow in your eyes such as a bright flame.
The smile… More earnest and sincere than any other in the whole of the universe.
Full of mercy, kindness and gentleness.
Your voice… One vowel would shake the whole universe, heck, one word made the earth. Like a million waterfalls and with so much authority.
Everything and everyone stops everything to listen to every word you say. Once you speak, it’s like a sword piercing your heart.
The way just how you are! Shining like light itself!
Who controls the clouds? Who does the thunder answer to?
Who paints the sunrise with light?! Who knows us before we are born?!
Who can look at the sun?! Who can look at a god who is even brighter than that?!
Everything beauty I can think of, whether it be a music piece that I listen to over and over created by man who is made in your image,
a breathtaking picture of a nebula floating in cosmos unknown,
a bird's intricate song,
every fibonacci pattern I always seem to find in flowers, ears and even pinecones or even a simple baby’s cry!!
It’s all a miniscule fraction, a broken mirror of who you are!...
How beautiful you are.
You come in golden light, majesty, splendor, exalted in righteousness and the angels raise their voices praising forevermore.
Who can understand the depth of your thoughts?
Who laid the foundation of the earth and set the planets in motion?
Who made heaven and earth? Who’s canvas is the universe?
…
I fell in love with you when I realized how amazing, heart-stopping, magnificent, stunning, awe-inspiring, drop-dead heart-stirring, moving, and overwhelming you are.
Realized that you are the creator who just merely spoke the universe into existence.
Realized that every breath, everything I see, every note my voice sings is a gift.
Realized how good you are.
Realized that you are…
God.
S.W (BTW, not sexual. just so you don't misunderstand)
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
My heart breaks in two 4 U... (Re posted)
Constant war in my mind. Never stopping doubts with progressing time. Am I doing this right? Am I saying every word perfectly in every place? Do the...
-
Oh... How wretched that I am... (Re posted
Oh how wretched that I am. Stuck in this sinful body. I resent myself. I do the things of which I hate and disdain. I relate to Paul who groans as he writ...
Wait! this is not explicit?
ReplyThe only reason it say's explicit is because it has the word sexu@l in it.
Reply