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This isn't the first time I have asked for advice on this situation, but I hope it is the last.
The basic information is I am a 16-year-old girl dating a guy online. I've been dating him for over a year, but the more time that goes on, the more I wish I never met him.
I am not supposed to have social media, so my parents don't even know about it, and we live from completely different backgrounds. I am a Christian who lives in America while he is a Muslim who lives in Africa- we both feel very strong about our religions, and it is sometimes hard for us to agree on things (but every relationship has its struggles). But the main problem for me is just how secret it is. Nobody knows, and I am lying to everyone. It's wrong and it is a sin.
But there's also nothing wrong with him. He is honestly, the sweetest most caring person I have ever known. He was there for me in my deepest moments and makes me so happy- so how can I want to leave someone who literally is so wonderful????
This is where I don't know what to do. A part of me loves him so much I could never stand the thought of leaving him. But another part of me wants to be 16, a part of me wants to be with someone who believes in the same things as me. A part of me that does not want to lie from the very people who loved me the day they took me home. I am so conflicted.
We talked yesterday about it, and I told him everything that I felt, and he believes that I am just overthinking and scared of my parents. He said there are millions of people in relationships and families where the parents believe different things.
But is that what I want.
I don't know.
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If its not meant to be you will know
-E
ReplyAs a former Muslim (now an agonistic due to religion trauma),
Take a break, for as long as you need it. You guys have been dating for a year and I'm proud of you for that, but the most important thing when it comes to relationships is literally about your own mental health. Tell him that it has nothing to do with your parents and that you think you might a break away from him, and that you want to try being yourself. If that doesn't go out well, try at least being friends instead, which hopefully make things easier.
-MRTS
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