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When I try to explain something, especially a complex topic, my brain often goes blank and I experience a peculiar sensation in my head. It's hard to put into words, but it feels like pressure on my head, neither painful nor comfortable. This sensation makes my thoughts feel numb and muddled.
This began after a difficult conversation with an ex-friend who often seemed not to understand me. At that time, I was already emotionally strained. We had a deep issue to discuss, so I prepared a detailed document outlining the problem. Despite my efforts to clarify and present my points, she misunderstood and rambled on about things I hadn't intended. I tried repeatedly to help her understand, but she never did. This left me feeling emotionally overwhelmed, and I eventually gave up, agreeing with her misconceptions. Since then, I've felt as though I've lost my ability to communicate effectively.
It's true that these sensations are just feelings, but the numbness and blankness in my head are genuinely distressing. I'm left wondering why I feel this way.
To clarify further, my friend often failed to communicate clearly and would become upset when I didn't understand her. I always made an effort to be clear and precise in my own communication, but she rarely did the same. I even found myself apologizing for her lack of clarity, while she never acknowledged her own shortcomings or apologized to me.
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Dear person who wrote this letter.
Firstly, I'm so sorry you had to go through this. It honestly sounds so tough that you had to experience this. My opinion on this is that it's your ex friend who needs to improve their communication more than us. Trust me, no one's communication will ever be perfect and that's okay.
Your mind goes blank probably due to the stress of trying to speak to someone about how you feel and that's really valid.
Keep on fighting and have a lovely 2024!!
Kindest regards
H
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