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I guess my problem with things is that you could have it all and still the good side of it all wouldn’t be it all... so I’m tired of reality, I’m tired of just... you name it, existence? Because there’s one thing I know “almost” for certain, and it’s that I’m here, but still this feeling escapes me every single time; the feeling that I’m not good enough, the feeling that something bad’s gonna happen to me. Imagine any possible scenario currently occurring on earth... do you think anything that could happen is currently happening? What is currently not happening? Would be a better, easier question... So yeah, I am so sick of waking up to reality and I feel like reality is untrustworthy and unreliable anymore. Picture yourself in my position, if possible, just try it, and envision someone who is so lost that they need to do a reality check like all the time with no effect whatsoever, and they just keep living... lying to themselves, holding on to a wishful thinking, etc. Just running around in circles and going nowhere. I can’t trust reality but I also know that what I’m feeling is very real... just what in the world is right for everyone? Why is or must life be so unfair? Because reality is a bitch, it’s endlessly going directions... and I don’t know which way to throw anymore.
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