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we used to be so close. i admired you, and i really did like you. you pressured me into hurting someone else, and you didn't take the blame for it. i know i did it, i know i was a part of it, but you didn't even try to admit it. they almost had to force it out of you. it wasn't my fault you told me to do something and i was honest about it. you began it as a silly little joke, something that would mess with her. you convinced me it was okay and that it wouldn't go that far, but suddenly when i was sitting in that office with the police and staff, you tried to make an excuse and blame it all on me. you never admitted you were scared or that you might've had some kind of hatred towards me, or that you even did what you did. you always tried to tell me different stories and excuses for stuff i asked you about, and you KNEW i knew about it. your goal was to hurt me. even if it wasn't, that's what it felt like. i remember when you first talked to me, and the way i smiled at your stupidity and friendliness. i remember when we exchanged numbers and talked 24/7, when we called eight hours a day, when we made all these fun plans to hang out and the games we played together. we only had one class together, the one we always wasted talking to each other and getting in trouble for disrupting the class.
i know i did wrong.
i know you know you did wrong.
your laughter, your humor, your words and your stupid little sayings, i miss it, i miss all of it.
i'm pretty pathetic for the times i try to find your contact in my phone.
i really, seriously, miss you.
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