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I don't consider myself suicidal as I don't think I am courageous enough to do so. However, I do find myself watching documentaries on euthanasia more than an average person would. I have never taken any step though and again I don't think I can bring myself to do that. But in my thoughts I do contemplate the notion of how if I wasn't here things would get easy.
I prefer solitude as only in that I find solace. Often I wish I could live on a hill top by myself far away from everyone.
I am just tired....so much so that I wake up tired....
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close to giving up
i feel hopeless. i'm overwhelmed with heavy thoughts of suicide and fear that i can't seem to place what it is from. i don't want to live anymore, i can't live...
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Nostalgia hits hard
I'm having a heavy moment of nostalgia hitting me. I went back to see what I used to write online when I was young on a public profile and I saw lots of message...
You may tell yourself things would be “easy” without you, but there are people that love you. There is someone out there that you have made an impact on whose life would be less without you. You are tired, but I can tell you haven’t given up. You are so strong to come on here and write your feelings for the world to see. Never give up, I will pray for you tonight and always ❤️
ReplyI hear you. I've been there too. I still struggle, but I wake up and try to live each day as best as I can. I try. You are not alone.
Keep yourself busy, encourage yourself over and over again each day, and surround yourself with goodness.
You have been brave and courageous for a long time, so carry on and be well 💐
ReplyThere is only 1 guarantee in life, only 1. And that is the guarantee that death will find us on its own; we most certainly do not need to look for it. Hopefully you inspire someone to keep going, to stay strong, to keep climbing, to live while they can. Best of luck.
Courtesy notice: the following includes a reference to a book that contains writings over 2000 years old which are mostly parables about human nature, both vile human nature as well as moral human nature, parables that are meant to teach us to learn and grow, including the teachings of Christ Jesus. No religion required, and better yet: no public displays of devotion required, although the former and latter are admirable if practiced freely out of one's own free will and without the threat of being beheaded. Some bullies will label this "trolling", so "change the channel" now if of no interest to you.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Mark 12:28-31
And Christ Jesus said the 2 greatest commandments are:
Love God first and foremost.
Love your fellow-being as you love yourself.
From following or not following these, all good or evil cascades, respectively.
Love...that powerful, invisible, intangible force that cannot be denied; even atheists live and die by it.
Mary, Mother of Christ, intercede for us with your prayers, now, and always.
And after our worst deeds - never forget God forgives us when we repent through Christ Jesus.
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