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I'm so done with seeing people with good friendships yet im here stuck with no one, and being surrounded forcibly with people I hate and I'm forced to be associated with them since they're considered "family friends". I've been jealous of people in the past. But its just like, its been wayy too long since I've actually had someone to talk to properly. Its to the point where I'm actually considering having an online friend, even tho I'm literally so scared it'll go wrong again. I got attached to some guy a couple years back, and honestly I dont even know what to label us as.. it was quite a questionable situation. And worst of all, I got attached so when he and I fell apart, it felt as if my heart was ripped out of my chest, I didn't feel like myself. So I've avoided being reliant on anyone else for my happiness source, but mentally I can't take it anymore. I need someone. But then again.. I literally hate texting. I prefer talking irl, and I know that better than anyone about myself. And I feel as if I've just gotten worse at communicating with people since I haven't had a good laugh with anyone in a WHILE, nor have I actually had a good convo with anyone in a while either.
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Replyno tbf, it all went downhill when someone I considered like a sister, decided to betray me. She used to be amazing and convis with her would heal me internally. Honestly js want a loyal friend who I can talk to and laugh with, but there's no one.
ReplyAh. Getting betrayed by someone you trust is a traumatizing experience. It's no wonder you feel hesitant to connect with people. I'm sorry that happened to you.
ReplyI've been in your situation and i also didnt recognize myself anymore, i also have attachment problem but i managed it by not expecting to much in people around me especially guys. The only advice i can give you is fix your self first create, boundaries , priorities your growth before letting someone again to enter your life , because when they leave you again you will never feel that pain again cause you know your worth.
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