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I am trying I really am and I know that my situation is not I deal but I do feel like I am failing all the time. I try to mask all my emotions all the time so I don't ruin others' day even though mine is pretty much rotten. I am grateful though in all the paths I have taken my God has never left me even when I stray he pulls me out of the deepest and darkest of wells even when I know I don't deserve to see the light of day. Yet, here I am happy, trusting and hoping. I cry sometimes and then I feel ungrateful so I stop yet I cry again sometimes I think I should be bawling my eyes out but then I think of others in worse situations than me and think of the tiny moments that give them joy and that makes me ask for the strength need to plow the day with. I am 11,914 km away from my home and my parents I am 19 all alone in Canada and I am currently an asylum seeker, I was supposed to go to the US to finish my secondary education but its almost been a year since I graduated from high school in Canada, the civil war happened at home lost contact with my family for 6 months and here we are, me in a foreign land and my family treated foreign on their land. Yeah also, I have a weight problem, I might be developing bulimia nervosa and loneliness is not to be forgotten from the mix too.
But I have Jesus and I know I will be fine.
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You looks bad today, why are you so nice all the time, why do you work so hard, you are so extra.
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