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sitting alone, in silence, in the middle of the night. that's what i've changed my life into. i don't really know what's happening around me. feels like i'm here breathing and taking but inside, deep down in my mind i just want to feel the high one more time. every day and every night. the whole month just disappeared from my memory. all the time. angry at myself for letting them down. but all the misery and guilt simply disappears. it feels like i was born high and i can't help to want that feeling back. even if it's destroying my life. i want to stop but im not in control anymore.
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