Hope is fading ( talk of self harm and SA

Hope is fading, i'm fading, the world around me I am fading. Why must the world be so cruel, we now have museums of "What were you wearing" it is not ever the victim's fault it is always the rapist. We kill off animals who are aggressive, so why don't we do the same to men instead of 15-30 in jail. I was 14 and my now ex-boyfriend, he goes unpunished. While it was not rape it was sexual harassment. We let it slide because

" its not that serious " Well fuck you its serious. it caused me to do self harm, multiple times, nearly every day. i would hold myself back from hitting him each day I walked by him in the hallways, from cursing him out in front of everyone that he was a monster. He believes we ended on good terms. I am thankfully near 10 months clean but i cannot go a day without thinking of the monster he is. How dearly he affects my life just by living his freely. I am so scared of ever being near him again but i laugh it off and say that everything is fine because it was over a year ago. Well fuck you, you piece of shit. I'm not your dude, your pal, your dumb nicknames can go to hell. I regret ever listening to my friends and dating you.You are the enemy that i fear. You are what i watch for in each man. You, are the reason that i am paranoid people might be following me. You, stupid boy, are the monster.