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Has there ever been a time when you look back on your life and really think about all of the things that have happened, all of the good and the bad?
I am an only child that has never been a bridesmaid, am not a God Mother, never been with a friend when they delivered. I have been there for people, so much so they take advantage of me. I don't like BS or fake people. I choose to be strong in front of people and never let they see me cry. But when I am alone at home or driving the tears just flow, like rivers. It's a cry of pain, they just flow. I have two children that keep me grounded and busy, but sometimes I wonder am I ever good enough.
I volunteer at my child's Booster Club and can't stand the politics and the favoritism. The whole PTA mafia thing sucks. I am just as important as anybody else and I am tired to feeling as though I am invisible. I wish my self esteem could be so much bigger that what it is. I fake it in front of my family, so they think I am strong and so they can have the self esteem that I lack.
For now, I will continue to work in a job that reminds me of the Groundhog Day movie.
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I don't understand why people think crying is a sign of weakness. It's a really good way of releasing built-up emotions and tension. I'm sorry that you have noone that you feel comfortable to share your troubles, but know that it's okay to feel bad. The fact that you feel unappreciated gives me the thought that you actually have self-esteem. I hope you'll get your life into a shape that you feel happy about and deserve. Take care and I wish you galons of luck!
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