The Man

We started out as strangers, a lifetime ago. It was in January when we first started talking - really talking. And by that I mean we would chat like acquaintances and sometimes he would offer to send me fallic photos. I never accepted - I found it strange that he offered, though. We had classes together, we were photography majors. The first time we hung out, he took me to Wupatki to scout locations to shoot milky way. I didn't feel like I knew him well enough yet, and fantasized all the ways he could kill me if he wanted to. He didn't. After this, we'd hung out a few more times. I would sometimes go to his house and we would smoke weed and watch TV, sometimes the Magicians, sometimes Batman Cartoons. A couple of times during these hangs, we would get a little physical. Kissing and touching. Then I'd pass out.

Spring break came and I went to visit family in the midwest. By this time, we had spent a couple of night's together. He had me over the morning before I left and made me breakfast. It was nice.

When I came back, he was back with is ex-girlfriend. Since we were never anything more than friends, we stayed that way. He still talked to me everyday, occasionally took me with him to shoot. I still did his homework for that Business of Photography class.

At graduation, I was stoned. Walking into the Skydome, I didn't know where to sit - I couldn't see any photo students around me. "You look lost" he said, coming down the stairs behind me. I was hoping I would see him that day. He led me away and we sat next to Taco. We spent our entire graduation together, him next to me, knocking my hat off. There are a lot of pictures - many still displaying his homepage on fb.

The summer was quiet. His girlfriend went abroad and he and I stayed here - we didn't spend much time hanging though. It makes sense.

They broke up and he spent his last couple of months in town propositioning me for a threesome and when I wouldn't oblige, he settled for taking me to shoot milky way weekly instead. We spent a lot of time together recently...comparative to how much we've seen each other since we met 10 months ago. But now he's moved.

Before he left, we tried a FWB sort of deal, except his benefit was dome and mine was getting to be around him. Also, he took me around the state on photo adventures - I'm okay with the deal.

He left yesterday and spent last night trying to get me to believe he's lonely. That he misses me. That he wasn't just using me to cure a loneliness left by another woman. I want to be strong.