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Why you ever think you want to die when you're at bottom level of depression. Option "die" is a nonsense. Are you sure your problem will end after you die? What if there is another problem appear after you die? Actually we never know what will happen after you die. How can you be sure you will go to heaven instead of hell? Or how can you be sure yes there is or no there isn't a reincarnation? What if yes there is a reincarnation, what gonna happen to you who give up to your life? Do you think you will born again in rich, happy, and lovey-dovey family? Is it logic? No, you are what you sow.
When you hit bottom level of depression, you still have right to chose whether or not you fight or give up. When you give up it means you lose, so don't you dare to think you will get reward. And if you fight, whether it works or not, you're win. You just need to try to stand up one more time little by little and praise yourself because you're strong.
I always praise and thanks myself whenever I hit bottom level of depression but I still can pass day after day. I said "Hang in there", "I know I can make it", "you're the best", "good job", "come on a little bit more", "thank you for being strong", "you can do it", "I don't care with people opinion", "okay, i'll think about what other people said", "who is the boss? I am the boss", and "I believe in myself".
Yes I always believe in myself, people will gonna betray me but myself never betray me. But you need to have you own faith such as I won't take drug, alcohol, and everything which destroy me, or I will make it simple, if you don't want be friend with me, I don't care because actually I don't really need friends but I will accept you if you want to be my friend.
And the last, stop staring another people idiot lifestyle in social media. It's just their mask. And don't show your lifestyle in social media because you are building your mask. You won't get any of recognition by that and you just waste your life.
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