I don't even know

How do you go from being engaged to someone for 3 years, to being single? How do you go from being a couple, from doing everything together...to being completely alone all the time? I didn't just lose my home, my life, and my fiance...I lost my best friend. I lost my confidant. I lost everything. And because I have a child, I feel like I've let him down because I invited this man into our lives, thinking it would be okay. And 7 months later...I still haven't found a way to explain to my 5 year old why I don't live with "daddy" anymore.

My family tries to be supportive, but they don't see how much it's killing me. And they keep saying "oh, well at least this will give you a chance to get your mental health under control and give you the confidence to know you can do it on your own." and I know they mean well...but the fact of the matter is, I don't want to be alone. I like being in a relationship. I like feeling like I have a home, and a family, and that my life isn't completely out of control. And I don't know if I can deal with everything on my shoulders and if I make one wrong move I'm going to be crushed under the weight.