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nirvana concluded in a 51/50. the hospital was cool. too cool. i liked it so much, i attempted suicide 3 more times after that.
i’m stuck in the mindset that preceded my first inpatient charge. i remember it like it was yesterday. i’m stuck there. remembering. i’m stuck wishing it never ended. i remember..
i was groovy. skinny, long hair, englarged pupils and a lust for the morning.
i just wanted to walk. i wanted to burn off the calories i hadn’t eaten in weeks. i was in charge. finally. 18 years i’d waited.
now.. stuck. a year’s time behind and between us. the old me. she wasn’t truly happy but she was numb enough not to mind. i was ripped from her. i didn’t even get to say goodbye.
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