an attempt for a poem

I drown myself in heavy tears,

trying to survive the pain my heart has to bear.

And at the end of the line I face my lonely fears.

There is no light, there is no spark.

Nothing takes away the pain I feel within;

Not the razor blade that cuts my pale skin.

The high is temporary,

The ache is persistent.

It devours me from inside,

leaving no desire to live behind.

The world’s colors absorbed by my inner bleakness.

Of death I am fearless.

And as I try to take away the grief

red tears run down my wrists,

baptizing my mistakes and my sins.

Depression is my happiness’ thief ever since.

Who will provide me with the light to fight my fears?

when I’m on my own.

Who will catch my scores of tears?

When I’m so alone.