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I have suicidal thoughts quite often. Some of it is depression, but alot of it is the morbid fascination of the otherside.
I am currently dealing with thoughts of me being worthless, a waste of space and never getting out of the endless cycle of living pay check to pay check.
My question to anyone who is also fighting with thoughts of suicide, what will it take to live another day?
Do you have a unfinished art project? An unwritten song? A wrong that needs to be righted?
Do you have a pet who would miss you?
A friend who looks up to you?
A sibling who idolizes you?
What is the one thing, that breaks your heart when you think of the end of your life?
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Hi there,
I used to have quite a lot of suicidal thoughts too. And now I have already moved past that stage, so I might be able to help you discover what will it take to live another day.
My motivation originates from people who I really admire and look up to. They give their best everyday and aim to surpass their past self. They are smart and highly emotional intelligent too.
The people I am talking about are hugely successful figures including an athlete who won two-time Olympic gold medals and a man who made record as the highest-earning man in the industry.
Looking at them makes me have faith in the world, knowing that there exists wonderful people like them. Their existence definitely cheer me up and shed a light in my life. And so, my motivation is to become a great person just like them and shed lights on other people's lives.
If a cup of coffee is too bitter, what would you do? You add sugar.
If the weather is too cold,what would you do? You put on more clothing to keep yourself warm.
If life is too dull, add more elements in your life that will excite you.
How would you know your passion? Recall the moments when you lost track of time, being totally immersed and absorbed in something , that everything else seems trivial in the face of that 'something'. To me, it's problem-solving and expressing my thoughts and learning new stuff.
So I pursued a degree in software engineering, write journals, read books and also get myself around those inspiring figures (despite I can only watch them through screens)
If you are feeling depressed, surround yourself with people who love life and dream big.
And when you constantly work on your passion, you would be definitely good at it.
And when you are good at something, you will be proud of yourself and not overlooking your sense of worth and values.
Remember , set aside some time for yourself every single day to rewind and do some self-care acts. It's never selfish to practice self-care. Make tiny changes every day so that you'd have things to anticipate every night before sleep. For example, tastes a foreign cuisine, get yourself a haircut, dress yourself up differently, have a walk in a new neighborhood etc.
Allow me to quote this from one of the people that transform my life :
When you drive, sometimes you check the road behind by looking at the rear mirror.
But if you look at the rear mirror all the time during driving, it's really dangerous isn't it?
To reach your destination safely, you focus on the front, on what's to come.
And so that's how you get rid of negative feelings and navigate through your life journey.
Leave the past behind and look forward to the future.
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